i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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