she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Randomize
