i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
you mean i was at the winter classic?
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
