fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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