Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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