I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Randomize
