bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Everything about him screamed your future.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
