Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
