She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize
