Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
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