If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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