I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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