Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
