hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
