Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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