I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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