I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize