i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
The ass gains better be worth it
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