"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
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