Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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