Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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