i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
