Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
