Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
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we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
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And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.