I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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