Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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