Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
