dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
