He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
