I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize