I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Randomize
