You don't have asthma, your pregnant
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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