ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
