but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
