But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize