im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
