I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
foreskin is a definite game changer
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
