this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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