I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize