I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
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He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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