WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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