the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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