Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize
