Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
our cab driver is having phone sex.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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