More tranny stories later!
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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