p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
