How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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