A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize