Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
she peed on how many people?
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
