oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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