I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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