Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
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