he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
